Ultima Parody Songs



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"50 Ways to Loot Another"
(lyrics and performance by Midas)

"the trick is all inside your head", she said to me
"I can loot a corpse clean in four seconds - maybe three"
"And if you'd like, I'd like to help you in your struggle to succeed"
"there must be 50 ways to loot another..."

she said "it's really not my habit to train thieves"
"after all, I've mastered ways of how to steal and to deceive"
"but I'll repeat myself, and so soon you will believe"
"there must be 50 ways to loot another... 50 ways to loot another..."

just snoop in the pack, Jack
steal the black pearl, Earl
take the vanq bow, Joe
and get your stuff free
run when you are grey, Ray
you just hide and stealth away
steal the house key, Lee
and get your stuff free

she said goodbye and smiled, then vanished out of sight
i checked my pack to find it empty - what a fright
and as she stealthed away I realized that she was right
there must be 50 ways to loot another... 50 ways to loot another...



Based upon, with the utmost respect for and apologies to:
"50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" - Paul Simon


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